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In the movie “Under the Tuscan Sun” (Touchstone Pictures, 2003), Frances is a newly-divorced American woman. On impulse she purchases a run down Italian villa. While fixing up the villa, she happens upon a snake. Frightened, she asks her realtor, Mr. Martini, to find it and chase it out. After he searches and does not find the snake, Frances decides to pour out her heart to him about her divorce.
Frances says that the "most surprising thing about divorce" is "it doesn't actually kill you." Even though it does not, she says that it should. Francis says, "When someone you've promised to cherish 'till death do you part' says 'I never loved you' it should kill you, instantly." She says that a person should not have to wake up everyday wondering how she missed the signs that it was coming, and she says it is fear that makes you stupid.
Mr. Martini responds, in Italian, that “love is blind." Frances observes that they have that saying in America. He says that is "because it's true everywhere."
Frances tells him that she does not want to be blind anymore, but she wants to face the facts. She looks around and says, "This house has three bedrooms. What if there's never anyone to sleep in them? And the kitchen, what if there's never anyone to cook for? I do, I wake up in the middle of the night thinking, ‘You idiot! You're the stupidest woman in the world. You bought a house for a life you don't even have.'"
He questions, "Why did you do it?" Frances says, "Because I'm sick of being afraid all the time." She tells him of her dreams, that she wants a wedding in the villa and a family. Her desire for these things is so strong that she begins to weep.
Mr. Martini tries to console her. He tells her that there is a place in the Alps in Italy that is "impossibly steep, very high part of the mountains. They built a train track over these Alps to connect Vienna and Venice. They built these tracks even before there was a train in existence that could make the trip. They built it because they knew some day the train would come."
I stood in my bathroom, in the morning, musing over an important decision I had just made about moving on with life. To do that, I had to let go of a dream I had held and become emotionally invested in. I knew it meant freedom from the emotional attachment and would open me to new blessings. Then, my heart was spoken to by Spirit. Spirit said, “Act free.” I immediately felt a surge of joy and hope. I knew the Spirit was saying, “Rather than just hope to be free from this, if you truly want to be free from it, start acting free from it.” I did.
See, my act was similar to what Mr. Martini was talking about, and similar to Frances buying that villa. Trusting in Divine Providence means we can, in the moment, begin praying and acting with faith in what we believe God has placed in our heart. We can, now, begin building the bridge, preparing the villa, acting with the freedom that will ready us for what God has for us.
Frances, even in her pain, chose not to act like a victim. She could have said, “Well, I have been so deeply hurt. I’ll go buy a villa and just live by myself.” No, that would have been a hopeless response to her pain. Rather, she chose to build the very setting that her new dream could come true in, and she believed that the dream could come true.
Hope is essential to our lives. We are not created to be victims of past circumstances or present attachments. We are creative creatures. We can allow ourselves, after loss and in pain, to allow a dream to be born in us again. Loss does not have to be a dead end. Loss can be another beginning point. The pain can hurt, but it does not have to close down our heart.
Have you allowed loss and pain to close your heart to what God might want you to enjoy? How might you claim that dream and begin preparing a place for it in your life?
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