|
Welcome to OneLife Ministries. This site is designed to lead you prayerfully into a heart experience of Divine Presence, Who is Love. While it focuses on Christian teaching, the writer hopes persons of other faiths find inspiration here. Indeed, "God" can be whatever image helps you trust in the Sacred, by whatever means Grace touches you. Please share this ministry with others, and I hope you return soon. There is a new offering daily.
Blessings,
Rev Dr Brian K Wilcox, MDiv, MFT, PhD
Ecumenical Pastor-Teacher, Author, Workshop Leader,
Spiritual Counselor, Chaplain
LISTENING TO THE SCRIPTURES
Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God's will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.
*Romans 12.2 (NLT)
RECEIVING SACRED TEACHING
For some reason, this year my rose bush has enjoyed birthing many more roses than usual. Rather than let them wilt in the sun, I have used them as gifts.
A friend I have is an elderly lady living alone nearby. I took her a rose. She loved it. She remarked, however, that she was disappointed it did not last. Later, appeared another beautiful red rose. I carried it to her room and put it in a glass of water for her.
Her daughter visited her. She told her daughter she did not know why, but she had been sneezing a lot. Unknown to me, she was allergic to flowers. Her daughter informed me. I found it odd, here I was giving something as a gift, yet it was not good for her.
I did find out the family would give her balloons, rather than flowers. She will get a balloon soon, but no more flowers.
* * *
Once, when in a matter of spiritual discernment, I knew if I sensed God leading me in a certain direction, a person I dearly cared for would strongly oppose me.
Over time, I began to discern I would not tell the person, not until I had followed God's Leading. I needed to exercise freedom from any strong outside influence, to what God might lead me to do within myself. If it meant doing what God led me, apart from the knowledge and support of others who meant much to me, then, I desired most to follow God's Desire.
This resolve arose from desire. That desire was to follow God's Leading. Desire indicates the direction of our heart - our inner will. Our desire to follow the Divine Leading must be there, in the heart, rather than to follow the leading of the many discordant voices about us.
* * *
What is good for us? And what appears beautiful, attractive, charming, but within it there is too much pain waiting?
Many persons have, for example, met what appears on the outside to be a beautiful person. Maybe the person was attracted - really, blinded - by the beauty, only to find out getting close to her or him was an invitation to much pain - like rubbing up to a thorn bush- or seeing the person was not beautiful in the most important ways.
This tendency to be attracted to what appears beautiful or desirable is indicated in the Story of the Garden of Eden:
The woman saw that the tree was beautiful, that its fruit was good to eat, and that it would make her wise. So she took some of its fruit and ate it. She also gave some of the fruit to her husband who was with her, and he ate it.
*Genesis 3.6 (NCV)
I John, also, points out the role of sight in our mistake of following what is attractive only on the outside:
For all that is in the world - the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride in possessions - is not from the Father but is from the world.
*I John 2.16 (NLT)
For example, how many times have you tried to stay on a diet, then, you see something you are not to eat, then, you have a strong desire, one you did not have the moment before?
The eyes are one means of our lusting, or having a strong and misleading desire, for something or someone. Yet, the Spirit is the Presence in us seeking to inspire the direction of our lives, and away from controlling, harmful desires.
The turning to follow Christ, then, entails a conversion of our desire. Our strong desire is to do God's Desire:
It means you have turned from your own desires and want to obey God for the rest of your life.
*I Peter 4.2 (CEV)
See, strong desire, literally, the broader meaning of lust, is not wrong. The direction of this controlling desire is what is of importance. The word lust, indeed, is found in the KJV for both our selfish desires or the desire of the Holy Spirit, which tells us that we can be led and controlled lovingly by good, dignified, and godly desires:
For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.
*Galatians 5.17 (KJV)
* * *
This tendency of ours to be misdirected by what appears a gift, sometimes one we think comes from God, but is not good for us, is a reason for spiritual discernment.
Yet, the first step in spiritual discernment is a resolve that one wants to fulfill God's Will. You will to will only what God wills. This decision happens when you initially say, "Okay, God, from now own, I truly want to please you, and do what is loving."
Then, what does a person do? Keep praying. The person is to learn to pray throughout the day, and to pray over decisions. The person learns to pray only for God's Will to arise and come to fruition in his or her life.
* * *
Divine Providence is the traditional reference to how God governs our lives. The underlying trust we have is in a God who is personally involved in our lives and world.
Here we exercise passive will. Like a sponge, empty, becomes filled with water. We, too, open for the Divine Will.
We do not sit down, first, trying to discern God's Desire. No, we pray first. We align our hearts with the Holy Spirit. Now, when that alignment is in place, we trust a process. We trust we will really get messages, in varied ways, as to how God is leading us.
We may see something, and we may feel very attracted to it. Yet, we offer it up in prayer. We return to the spirit of a prayer that reflects the heart of God:
May your kingdom come
and what you want be done,
here on earth as it is in heaven.
*Matthew 6.10 (NCV)
We can see "kingdom" as influence, power, and benevolence. The word is a symbol with many implications. It tells us "God" is like the best of Kings. We want everything, and ourselves, to be under the sway of the Holy Spirit of Love.
We desire there be concord between "earth" and "heaven." For the Divine Will to be done here, now, in your life, means the act and thought is in agreement with what we call "heaven." So, there is inner peace, or concord. We can feel this. We do not feel the inward unrest and conflict.
* * *
Now, what happens if you did follow the Divine Will, but things turned out hurtful? The outcome of a decision is not a sure indicator you did not act in agreement on earth as in heaven.
After my divorce, persons were informing me I made a mistake in getting married as I did. I had clear recall of the prayer and peace I knew when I asked my ex-wife to marry me, however. I often returned to that time, when I had that sudden, perfect, inner peace. I recall the joyful freedom I was given to ask her to marry me. So, there was my experience, and the voices of others saying something else.
If you discern you believe you did follow the Divine Will and it turned into an outcome questioning that, you can gently and prayerfully work with the matter. You do not have quickly to judge you did not follow the Divine Will. You do not need to listen to other persons deciding for you, though you might get insight from them.
Go back to the decision. Reflect prayerfully, being willing to be inspired to have the Spirit confirm or not you were in the Divine Will. If you need, seek spiritual guidance from someone to guide and support you. Indeed, this process can be painful, and you may need such kind assistance. Likewise, you may need someone to hold you accountable in the process, for you may not be as prepared as you think to be honest and not get into rationalizations that blur clarity. Often, when things mess up, we run to familiar excuses.
We may find it more difficult to confess we did follow God's Leading, only to mess it up with decisions later, than to confess we failed to follow the Spirit in the first place. In one, you are confessing, "God led me, I followed. God gave me a gift. I take responsibility for messing it up." In the second, you are admitting, "I really messed up from the start, for I took as gift something that God never willed for me."
Do you see how we may find it easier to say, "Look, I took that and it was wrong to begin with, I should never..."? When we do that, we can have a sense of subtle escape. We shift the main mistake back to the choice that started it all, away from all the choices in the way we handled something wonderful given to us by God.
We can find it more difficult to say, "God, you did give me something wonderful, and I took it and did not honor it as I ought." We can find it problematic to admit we took a gift God gave and found a way to push it out of our lives or mess it up so that it led to much needless hurt, of others and ourselves.
Yet, the suffering of denying our role in not honoring God's Will given us will lead to more suffering. If we discern we did not honor God's Leading given us, what we received as the Divine Leading, we need to let ourselves gently suffer through the admission of that.
* * *
Likewise, we will need to discern whether to ask forgiveness from a person or others hurt by our choices. We can choose, based on circumstances, a medium for the request. Certainly, there are situations that do not need such an act, especially those in which you have been severely abused by someone or you know the person would be hurt more by your addressing a matter with him or her.
In the latter cases, there are prayerful ways to confess and ask forgiveness from the person. You can enter the quiet and prayerfully, in silence, visualize a scene in which the person, you, and Christ are together. You admit to the person, with Christ listening lovingly, of your sorrow for hurting him or her. You, furthermore, speak to Christ of your wish that He bless the person and heal her or him of any emotional wounds caused by you. You may end the prayerful meditation with the flow of Healing Light from Christ surrounding and filling you and the other person, as well as connecting your heart to his or her heart.
Remember, in the above prayer meditation, you are not trying to do something for the other person yourself. This is not about you. This is about you three - the other, Christ, you - and others in your lives. It is about all of you in relationship, and the Will of God being done in the relationship.
* * *
At times we can go back and, in a sense, re-accept the Divine Will. Possibly, we abandoned a relationship God had given us, a vocation, a way of living - whatever. After discernment, we may be led to seek its healing and beginning anew. That new start may be part of healing and getting back in the center of the Divine Will for your life, and the same for the other, or others.
* * *
Furthermore, in spiritual discernment and Divine Providence, patience is a key. In the fruit of the Spirit is "patience," or "perseverance." When we live "Your will be done," we give time to discern when something is of God-for-us or not of God-for-us.
After my divorce, I went through a period of varied physical and emotional symptoms. I survived that, and entered a state of profound spiritual insight and sensation. One night, just days after much suffering physically, I entered a state that was one of the most profound spiritually I had known. It was so strong, I found I could not sleep.
This led me into conversation with a wise friend. I felt like the Divine was just over the Other Side from me, wanting to get through to me, and I was wanting to get through, too. The night before I had, indeed, felt so close to Spirit, I could barely contain it physically. The person advised me to relax, wait patiently, and see how matters might evolve and clarity arise.
I took her advice. The next day, without trying, I felt more reconciled to the Spirit working in my day to show me what I needed to see, than I could recall. I felt free from a sense of desperation or strong desire to find out the Divine Will in all I was seeking discernment in. This was Peace. See, what had happened was redirection of my will, and an opening within me, afresh, to wait patiently and trustingly.
* * *
Recall, we looked at trusting again yesterday. Trust is linked to patience and is central in a relationship with Divine Leading. Trusting God, we can relax patiently. In this relaxation, we can be alert to anyway Spirit works through situations and persons to give hints or clear messages of Guidance.
Now, being patient does not entail any manner of delay. We are not to use patience to conclude, "Okay, I can take my time." This is not about my time. Discerning spiritually means we resolve to be open to act in a right way, at a right time. We may find we needed patience to discern something, only to see we are to act promptly, afterward, to follow that Leading of God.
* * *
When we discern Divine Leading, we may find what we are led to do raises two apparently logical "voices." Our inner "voice" may say things like, "People will not agree with this...," "Your family will think you crazy...," "Your friends will ...," "But what if...". That is the voice of others, in a sense. Your inner voice may raise similar ideas: "Well, I tried this before, and it did not work,..."; "Am I being stupid or what?"; "What if I am just fooling myself?"; ...
The voices can be strong, very strong. Do not get discouraged with them. Do not try to force yourself to be stronger than the voices. Relax into Spirit, ask for Divine help. God will give Grace.
* * *
We can act in assurance that Divine Leading will never lead us to act selfishly. God will never direct us to bring unnecessary hurt to anyone. God will always act in Love, give us the Love to act in Love, and grace us to act and speak lovingly. Sure, we sometimes do not act in this way. We are all learning, are we not?
* * *
When we are seeking discernment spiritually, we need to be careful to whom we seek help and speak of this to. Many kind persons will not give us good advice. Indeed, the more a person loves you, the more he or she may not support you in doing what God wills for you to do. For example, if God is leading you to do something difficult or with potential hurt, someone may discourage you out of wanting to protect you. Yet, just look at Jesus - the disciples tried to discourage his going to the cross. Yet, Jesus willed more to do the Will of God-the-Father, even at cost to him. In that, he showed us a love that places the Divine Good first.
* * *
Is there ever a time to act in seeking to follow God's Will without complete clarity about the perfect Divine Will? Yes, I think so. Sufficient to say, for now, when acting without complete clarity, have clarity in the manner of your acting. Again, do all in Love and for Love, and always with intent for the good of the other - in the Divine Will, the good of one is the good of all, even if we fail to see that clearly in a present situation.
QUIETLY RESPONDING
Is there any matter over which you need to pray for discernment. Do not tell anyone about it. Rather, go to a quiet place. Present the matter in prayer. Wait in patience, to discern what the Spirit might inspire in you. Give any voices that disturb your openness to God's Leading to the Divine Presence. Ask for grace to do whatever you have heard, or, if no clarity arose, pray for patience and discernment to arise in time.
Blessings!
Rev Dr Brian K Wilcox
* * *
*OneLife Ministries is a ministry of Brian K. Wilcox, of SW Florida. Brian lives a vowed life and with his two dogs, Bandit Ty and St. Francis. Brian is an ecumenical spiritual leader, open to how Christ manifests in the diversity of Christian denominations and varied religious-spiritual traditions. He is Senior Chaplain for the Charlotte County Sheriff's Office, Punta Gorda, FL.
*Brian welcomes responses to his writings or submission of prayer requests at barukhattah@embarqmail.com .
*Contact the above email to book Brian for Spiritual Direction, retreats, or workshops. You can order his book An Ache for Union at major book dealers.
|
