A former student gave the Zen Teacher a crystal cup. The Master enjoyed it, drinking from it daily and telling visitors it was a gift from a former student. Each morning, he would hold up the cup, look at it, and say, "This cup is already broken."
One day, while it was sitting on a shelf, a visitor's hand brushed against it. It fell to the floor, crashing into many small pieces.
The other visitors were aghast. The man whose hand brushed against it was apologetic. The Master was calm.
The Master looked at the broken pieces. He said, "Ah! Yes. Let's begin." He forthrightly picked up a broom and began sweeping.
* * *
Everything breaks. Yet, we can live in the past, blaming, gripping, and groaning, or begin again. We can say, "Yes, and start sweeping." The other side of ending is beginning.
Recently, I was dismissed from my apartment. I had nowhere to live. I lay awake wondering if I would find anywhere to live in my state - that is, one I could afford. The landlord, who lived in the house on another floor above me, got upset. I did not understand why and was in shock initially. He could not clarify why, only placing blame and acting like he understood my intentions. He approached me two times, once upstairs and shortly after downstairs; both times, I ended up quietly walking away. Finally, he lifted his hands, exclaiming, "This is not working for me! You have thirty days to be out." This without even saying why it was not working. And not once had we had any altercation in the three prior months after my arrival. All had been friendly between us.
Later, via email, I told the landlord I would be out in thirty days and wished him well. I notified him we would not have any further contact. He never spoke another word to me. I was out of the house in a few days, thankfully able to stay with some friends.
Of course, now in my mid-60s, I have had other moments of total surprise at an apparent bad turn of fortune. I had, also, already been a few days from living homeless, so I had faced the uncertainty of housing before. I lived legally homeless for years after leaving my work as a church pastor. Of all the times of apparently unfortunate loss, I have seen a welcome beginning. At times, it just took a while for me to accept the new beginning was present for me to receive as a gift.
Receiving a new beginning as a gift is not the same as taking the reactive attitude, "I must put my life back together." In a sense, the gift is not about a life needing to be put together again.
* * *
Splash! And we cannot put the pieces back together. We have the cup to break many times during our lifespan. Demise of a family member or dear friend. End of a friendship or marriage. Betrayal by someone we placed trust in. Sudden illness. Loss of a job. Foreclosure on a home. Loss of physical independence. Loss of our religion and, with it, a primary support system. Bankruptcy. Realizing a dear hope will never come to pass. The final cup breaking is bodily demise - the body breaks; it was never intended to last, no more so than our vehicle, smooth skin, a morning fog, or springtime.
Life is made up of endings, which are beginnings. I have moved on from the thirty days to get out. I am thankful for the dismissal, and I now realize it was not a place that fit me or my faith path.
* * *
To walk forward, we cannot keep sitting in a place of loss. We cannot set up tent and moan where we have been and be where we want to be. Sure, we may need some time to adjust to the reality of an ending. Loss and endings can be shocking and painful. But the respite, too, can be the beginning.
A spiritual path does not make us immune to the pain of the cup breaking. All the positive thinking in the world will not protect us from heartache. We can learn to respond with calm. We can begin again, we can start sweeping.
* * *
*(C) Brian K. Wilcox, 2024. Permission is given to use photographs and writings with credit given to the copyright owner.
*Brian is a lay Buddhist of the Plum Village lineage and practitioner in Open Heart Sangha North, Bath, Maine. He is a Buddhist, interspiritual chaplain, specializing in facilitating groups in correctional facilities and remote spiritual care. Brian is much influenced by Jesus' example and teachings as found in the Christian Gospels, while seeing Jesus as free of the trappings of all religion.
*Brian's book is An Ache for Union: Poems on Oneness with God through Love. The book is a collection of poems Brian wrote based on wisdom traditions, predominantly Christian, Buddhist, and Sufi, with extensive notes on the poetry's teachings and imagery.
