|
Comments
There was a Sioux chief's daughter with many relations, so that everybody knew she belonged to a large family. When she grew up, she married, and there were born to her twin sons. This caused great rejoicing in her father's camp, and all the village women came to see the twins. She was very joyful.
As the babes got older, their grandmother made for them two saddlebags and brought out a donkey. "My two grandchildren," she said, "shall ride as is proper to children having so many relations. Here is this donkey; he is patient and surefooted. He shall carry the little ones in the saddlebags, one on either side of his back."
One day the chief's daughter and her husband were preparing to go on a camping journey. The father, who was very proud of his children, brought out his best pony and put the saddlebags on the pony's back. "There," he said, "my sons shall ride on the pony, not on the donkey; let the donkey carry the pots and kettles." So, his wife loaded the donkey.
Right after the wife loaded the donkey, he began to rear and bray and kick. He broke, from off his back, the tent poles and kicked the pots and kettles into bits and tore the skin tent. The more he was beaten, the more he kicked. At last, they told the grandmother. She laughed. "Didn't I tell you the donkey was for the children!," she cried. "He knows the babies are the chief's children. Don't you think he will be dishonored with pots and kettles?" She got the children and slung them over the donkey's back. The donkey became quiet.
The traveling party left the village and went on the journey. But, the next day, as they passed by a place overgrown with bushes, a band of enemies rushed out, lashing their ponies and sounding their war whoop. The men seized their lances. After a long battle, the enemy fled. When the camping party came together again, however, where were the donkey and the two babes? No one knew. They searched for a long time, but in vain. At last, they turned to go back to the village, the father mournful, the mother wailing. When they came to the grandmother's tepee, there stood the donkey with the two babies in the saddlebags.
The Sioux story speaks to the donkey in each of us. Have you ever felt like the donkey--called to a special task other persons did not feel you worthy of? Possibly, other persons did not have the confidence in your calling or in your readiness to meet some of its demands on you. Like the donkey, we might have to contend sometimes for our right to fulfill the sacred Purpose we are called to fulfill. We should not settle for other person’s estimation of us, when they express doubt in our calling.
However, we are usually the persons who question our calling or our capability to meet it. Our own self-doubt is a greater threat than how other persons esteem us to fulfilling our sacred Purpose.
As a Pastor, I have experienced plenty of doubts of other persons and self-doubts. In one pastorate many persons sought to block my ministry and transfer of ordination, for they judged me not conservative enough. If I had listened to them and taken their slanders and provocations to heart, I would have judged myself unfit for being a Christian Pastor. My Bishop spoke to me about how easy it can be to start believing the critics, and he urged me not to. I did not. Rather, their criticisms tested my Purpose, and I now am more committed to and enjoy being a Pastor more than ever before. Their doubts in me made me face my own self-doubts about the calling, and resolve wavering about it. They did me a service, though they intended to harm. Likewise, the dear persons who supported me through the many months of malicious oppositions, showed to me that God would always have persons for me to serve, regardless of how I might be faring in the estimation of some.
I still face self-doubts due to the challenge of being a Pastor: sometimes I feel overwhelmed by it. I daily pray in trust to God, knowing the Holy Spirit will sustain and use me in the Purpose assigned by Divine Providence. And, yes, when my own doubts arise or other's doubts lead to their questioning or slandering, I am confident the Spirit will confirm the calling in some way, as the Spirit has done many times, before.
Remember that even Jesus was deserted by many of his disciples, for they could not bear his teaching. St. John 6.66 reads: At this point many of his disciples turned away and deserted him (NLT). Jesus, however, was faithful to his Purpose, he knew it came from the one he called "my Father," and, thus, he never allowed positive or negative human estimation to define the calling or his faithfulness to it.
Prayer
Spirit of Christ, confirm each one of us in our sacred calling. Regardless of the challenges, opposition, or self-doubts, send us the signs that will encourage us along the way to remain true to our Purpose. May we never judge any task pertaining to our calling to be above or below our dignity, but do everything, large and small, noticed and unnoticed, as having eternal significance in Your Goodwill. In Christ's Name, Amen.
*This article is dedicated, as an expression of gratitude, to Bishop Timonthy W. Whitaker, Florida Conference UMC, and the dear Christian sisters and brothers who supported their Pastor during a difficult year plus in 2005-2006. Thank you, and my love to you each. I will always remain grateful for your faithful love. Your confidence in and support of me, God used in ways you will never, on earth, know. Did not we touch depths of Christian love, joy, and peace that we had never so known as part of the Body of Christ? Grace! brian k.
**OneLife writings are offered by Brian K. Wilcox, a United Methodist pastor serving in the Florida Conference of the United Methodist Church. He writes in the spirit of John Wesley's focus on the priority of inner experience of the Triune God; scriptural holiness; ongoing sanctification; the goal of Christian perfection (or, wholeness). Brian lives a vowed contemplative life with his two dogs, Bandit Ty and St. Francis, in North Florida. OneLife writings are for anyone seeking to live and share love, joy, and peace in the world and in devotion to God as she or he best understands God.
|
